Girl, I be runnin’ mad low on dividends…
Wouldn’t it be neat if I could get away with saying stuff like that? You know why I can’t? Because I say stuff like, “wouldn’t it be neat”
One time I told my cousin he better “recognize,” I was met with a blank stare and a muffled laugh.
Man I wish I could pull off cool.
Alas, I cannot.
Throughout my time as an uncool, white girl I have tried to incorporate hip jargon into my vocabulary (another reason I’m not cool… hip… really Savannah… I’m embarrassed for myself)
So far, I have successfully integrated “Girl” into my vocabulary. It may not seem like much, but when I first decided this was a word I wanted as part of my lexis it didn’t flow smoothly or appear to fit in with my syntax. Now I can use it flawlessly.
The other day in a work meeting I said, “Baby Mama Drama” in context and was met with approval. I was proud. Well, at least everyone in the meeting laughed, which was partially my intention. I also took their laughter as sanctioning my use of the term.
People in New York say “mad” frequently. I like it. I wish I could say it. I tried it once and sounded foolish. It just didn’t fall out of my mouth properly. I’ll try again. Much like girl, it’ll take a while to sound right in my vocabulary. I’ll practice alone in my bedroom, once I feel comfortable I’ll practice on strangers who don’t know it isn’t common for me to say, and then, I’ll test it out on my friends. Once I have built confidence in my use of the word then no one will question my ability to use it. Right? Being cool is hard.
Now if you’ll excuse me I have to finish knitting this sweater while reading the bible and square dancing.